Thursday, January 18, 2018

How to Get Over Being Cheated On and Move On

Have you ever had complete 100% trust in someone? You trusted this person so much that you never doubted them for a minute? ... That is, until they gave you a reason to doubt them? And then that complete trust you once had was tossed out the window as if it never even existed?

Remember that moment that you first found out. Maybe your spouse or significant other slept with someone else or were simply talking to other females in an inappropriate fashion. At first, you don't want to believe it. It has to be some sort of misunderstanding. It can't be true. He wouldn't do that to you; he loves you too much.

Until you have all of the proof right in front of you. You feel like your entire world is crashing down on top of you. He touched another woman! He told her he loved her! He said he loved me! How can this have happened? What did I do wrong?

No matter what the reason for cheating is, it's not you, it's them. If they weren't happy in the relationship then they should have gotten out first. Being cheated on can kill a person's self-esteem and make them feel worthless and just not good enough.

It's Up To You

Will you stay or will you go? No one can make that decision for you, but you. It's your decision if you want to try to forgive and forget the bad deed and work on the relationship or if you want to move on by yourself. In my opinion, if you forgive them for cheating once, that gives them a green light to do it again because they think you will be ok with it each and every time. It's not worth it to me, but like I said, that's your decision, not mine.

Most people will choose to leave a relationship once the other person cheats. Then you are left with a hole in your heart, feeling that you will never be able to move past this. You don't want to be with anyone else, you won't be able to trust again, and you won't be able to love again.

Eventually though, it will get better.

The thing is, it won't be the same for everyone. You can do things to help ease the pain, but it's going to take time.

  • The best thing you can do is surround yourself with loved ones and friends whom you can talk to about what you are feeling. Go out and have fun instead of sitting at home letting your thoughts get the best of you.
  • Find a new hobby. Discover a new hobby that you really enjoy and concentrate on that new hobby. Whether it be collecting something or creating something, see what's out there that really sparks your interest.
  • Cut off contact with the other person. They may grovel and beg for your forgiveness, but the best thing you can do is to not respond. Block them if you have to. There is nothing in the world that justifies cheating and you don't need to listen to the excuses or the apologies. 
  • Work on yourself. What's something you have been wanting to do for yourself for a long time? Maybe lost some weight? Work out more? Get a massage? Pay some attention to yourself and you will feel a lot better in the long run.
  • Make a to-do list. We all have things that we want to get done in the back of our head, but we just never get around to it. Well, stop just thinking about it and get busy! Make a list of some of these things and work on them as you have time. Always keep yourself busy so that you don't have time to think about your last relationship.
Whatever you do, do not jump into a relationship to fill that void. You need time to heal your broken heart before attempting a new relationship. This can be difficult because if someone hurts us, the first thing we want to do is prove to ourselves and that other person that we can find someone better, but rushing into a new relationship is not going to turn out well. You don't want to bring that baggage into a new relationship, so you must ensure that you are healed before moving on to someone new. That's not fair to the new person or yourself to do that.

Relaxation meditation

The biggest thing you need to remember is that you deserve better than to be with someone who can't or won't be faithful. You should be with someone who will never purposely do anything to hurt you.

You are worth more than that!

Once you feel the hurt lessen and that you are ready to date again, get out there and do it. Keep your guard up, but don't be afraid to open yourself up to new possibilities.

Tweet: How to move on from being cheated on: #infidelity #cheatedon #divorce @tatteredsoul77

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Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Good Riddance to 2017, Welcome 2018!

I typically enjoy going over an end of the year review--thinking back on things that have happened over the last year. As I’m sitting here thinking about 2017, all I can say is 2017 has sucked ass!!

Nothing extraordinary happened this year, not much good happened at all. I mean, I’m here. I survived. I’m still alive, but that’s about it. We had a few fun things that we did, but nothing really noteworthy except for back in June when an old friend came to visit, whom I hadn’t seen in 10 years. That was a blast!!

My book was released December 1, so that was definitely a good thing.

Which, btw, can be purchased directly through me for a cheaper price right here. This is kind of a big deal to me because it’s something I’ve dreamt of doing for many years. Now, I just need to get motivated enough to work on my next book. I’ve already started it, but can’t seem to be motivated to work on it much.
I’ve sort of lost my motivation for blogging as well. I feel like I’ve been working all year to write quality content here and promote the Hell out of it, but my pageviews just seem to stay the same. I know we are not supposed to compare ourselves to others, but it’s frustrating to see other bloggers bragging about making 5k a month while I’m struggling to make pennies. Why doesn’t shit ever seem to work out for me? It’s like, I watch everyone else succeed at things, but it never happens for me. Like I’m just not meant to be successful--at anything. I can’t afford to pay hundreds of dollars to take a course or get personalized help. I’m a struggling single mother, I just don’t have it.

So, what do I do? Give up? I feel like, what’s the point of putting my effort into writing blog posts if no one reads them? Should I expand what I write about? I love writing, obviously, and don’t want to throw it all away, but is it just a waste of my time? I don’t expect to get rich, but come on! I’m struggling here!!

Here is to hoping, wishing, and praying that 2018 is a better year.

How was your year?

Tweet: Good bye 2017, Hello 2018. Here's to a better year!! See: #2018 #2017sucks #newyear @tatteredsoul77


Thursday, December 7, 2017

Win A Free Copy of My New Book!

Soooo, my new book has been released!!

I'm so super excited to have this finished and finally available for sale, but first, I am giving away TWO copies of the book on my freelancing website. It's super easy to enter, so go here.

It has all of the information that you need there. If you just want to check out the book for yourself, it is available on Amazon as a print copy or on Kindle.

What started on this blog right here has now turned into a book. I hope that it can help others who are dealing with these evil human beings.